Gary Chapman’s, Five Love Languages is my must-read book. It is my must-have conversation with every new friend, old friend, and random stranger at the airport.
I am blessed with a platform to teach this love message to students just starting out into adulthood. I have a professional curriculum that I am required to teach. This is a bonus lecture that I am compelled to share.
When you know how to love someone on purpose and intentionally the way that THEY understand it, relationships are revolutionized; Marriages are saved. My passion for the message in this book became a communication crusade: Love on purpose.
We all have love tanks that need to be filled. When the love tanks are on empty for too long, the ugliness starts to emerge. Spouses think, “he doesn’t love me anymore.” The logical conclusion to an empty love tank leads to a dissolved relationship. Learning the 5 Love Languages will help you translate how your partner is requesting love. You will feel empowered to request what YOU need to feel loved. The 5 Love Languages are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Quality Time, Gifts, and Physical Touch.
Three clues to help you find out what your love language is (or your partner’s):
- What do you complain about? (“We never go out anymore” –“You never help me around the house.” – “We never hold hands.”)
- What do you give away? When your partner is hurting or sick, look at how you give comfort.
- When your feelings get hurt, what do you pull back on?
Being fluent in your partner’s love language will help you understand that the complaint is really a request to be loved. I am saddened that marriages end and families are broken because of a translation issue. The 5 Love Languages impacted how I ask for love. Understanding the message changed the dynamics of every relationship. My friend Erinn was right that this book was going to change my life. By teaching the 5 Love Languages to new friends, old friends, and random strangers, we all learned how to love on purpose.
Reflect & Share: Watch the 3 minute video and take the Assessment.
a. What is your primary and secondary love language?
b. What three specific things can your partner do to love you on purpose and intentionally using your love language?
“How Can I Make My Marriage Last? Part 4 (blog)
“Gary Chapman reveals keys to a great marriage!” (podcast)
“What’s Your Character’s Love Language?” (blog)
“five love languages” (blog)
“Love’s Language Lost” (blog)
“BE MORE LIKE THE DOG” (blog)
“My Secret Weapon For Leading A Happy Team” (MarieTV) by Marie Forleo